Saturday, May 28, 2011

Wk4 Comment #1 to Peter Binskin


Peter wrote:
What a ride this book has been! As I was reading the coda I realized that I had begun a definite shift in my thinking about how I view myself in this world and in relation to others. I must admit to a deep desire to send a copy of this book to my ex-wife in Australia but fear that she may not read it. Chapter 12 really brought it home to me about the WE and the revenge monster. I have so hated my ex for 13 years since we split (she got the house and basically everything) and discovered through one of my stepchildren that she has breast cancer and will be on aggressive chemotherapy for another year. He showed me video and photos of a woman I wouldn’t have even recognized and my revenge monster took a major beating. I wish the last words I had ever spoken to her 12 years ago were ones that I could be satisfied with as decent last words but, even though I have forgotten what they were, I’m sure they would not have been too flattering. Time to start being the board, being where I am at the time and not blaming anyone else for my foibles no matter how justified I have felt myself to be. So where was this book in 1998 and would it have made a difference? I’d like to think so. It has certainly helped me understand a new way to be a leader, a new way to frame a future with a vision of possibilities and a way to view my mistakes. How fascinating!
Creative commons image by sylvar's photostream



 
Peter,
I am a firm believer that what seems like a mistake at the moment in fact opens the door to endless possibilities. I think we all have those memories of “if only I hadn’t said…” This book makes a great point about leaving people with words to be remembered by (positively). I also have an “ex” and I sometimes shudder to think about where I would be if life’s events hadn’t taken such a wrong path in that relationship. Would I be truly as blessed as I am now? I hardly think so.

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